A Fresh Start

I want to start fresh. See you all at my new blog.
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http://talkingtojoel.blogspot.com/

Relationship Truths

-- from Elmer II of DL

The ten types of relationship that won't work:

1. You care about your partner more than he does about you. 2. Your partner cares more about you than you do about him. 3. You are in love with your partner's potential. 4. You are on a rescue mission. 5. You look up to your partner as a role model. 6. You are infatuated with your partner for external reasons. 7. You have partial compatibility. 8. You choose a partner in order to be rebellious. 9. You choose a partner as a reaction to your previous partner. 10. Your partner is unavailable.

The six BIGGEST mistakes we make in the beginning of a relationship:

1. We don't ask enough questions. 2. We ignore warning signs of potential problems. 3. We make premature compromises. 4. We give in to Lust Blindness. 5. We give in to material seduction. 6. We put Commitment Before Compatibility.

Seven Wrong Reasons to be in a Relationship:

1. Pressure(age, family, friends, etc.) 2. Loneliness and desperation 3. Sexual hunger 4. Distraction from your own life 5. To avoid growing up 6. Guilt 7. To fill up your emotional or spiritual emptiness.

The Lust into Love Formula:

1. First, you feel powerful sexual chemistry with someone or, in raw terms,lust. 2. Next, you act on those urges and have sex with that person. 3. Then you experience some guilt or discomfort having been so sexually intimate with someone you aren't that emotionally connected with. 4. Finally you create a relationship with that person to legitimize your lust.

Five Realities about Love:

1. Love is not enough to make a relationship work -it needs compatibility and it needs commitment. 2. It just takes a moment to experience infatuation, but true love takes time. 3. It is possible to experience true love with more than one person -there are many potential partners you could be happy with. 4. The right partner will fulfill many of your needs but not all of them. 5. Good sex has nothing to do with true love, but making love does.

Five Deadly Myths about Love:

1. True love conquers all. 2. When it's really true love, you will know it the moment you meet the other person. 3. there is only one true love in the world who is right for you. 4. the perfect partner will fulfill you completely in every way. 5. when you experience powerful sexual chemistry with someone, it must be love.

Fatal flaws to watch out for in a partner:

1. Addictions. 2. Anger. 3. Victim consciousness. 4. Control freak 5. Sexual Dysfunction. 6. Hasn't grown up. 7. Emotionally unavailable. 8. Hasn't recovered from past relationships. 9. Emotional damage from childhood.

Seven compatibility time bombs that can destroy a relationship:

1. Significant age difference. 2. Different religious background. 3. Different social, ethnic, or educational background. 4. Toxic in-laws. 5. Toxic ex-spouse. 6. Toxic Stepchildren. 7. Long-distance relationships. Six qualities to look for in a mate: 1. Commitment to personal growth. 2. Emotional openness 3. Integrity 4. Maturity and responsibility 5. High self-esteem. 6. Positive Attitude towards life

10 Secrets of A Happy Couple

I got this article from a bulletin board. Just thought I'd share this with y'all.

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Happy couples know that the real relationship begins when the honeymoon is over. Unless you maintain the garden of love, its beauty will witherand die. So let's explore the 10 things that happy couples do:

1. Go to bed at the same time. Remember the beginning of your relationship, when you couldn't wait to go to bed with each other to make love? Happy couples resist the temptation to go to bed at different times. They go to bed at the same time, even if one partner wakes up later to do things while their partner sleeps.

2. Cultivate common interests. After the passion settles down, it's common to realize that you have few interests in common. But don't minimize the importance of activities you can do together that you both enjoy. If common interests are not present, happy couples develop them. At the same time, be sure to cultivate interests of your own; this will make you more interesting to your mate and prevent you from appearing too dependent.

3. Walk hand in hand or side by side. Rather than one partner lagging or dragging behind the other, happy couples walk comfortably hand in hand orside by side. They know it's more important to be with their partner than to see the sights along theway.

4. Make trust and forgiveness your default mode. If and when they have a disagreement or argument, and if they can't resolve it, happy couples default to trusting and forgiving rather than distrusting and begrudging.

5. Focus more on what your partner does right than what he or she does wrong. If you look for things your partner does wrong, you can always find something. If you look for what he or she does right, you can always find something, too. It all depends on what you want to look for. Happy couples accentuate the positive.

6. Hug each other as soon as you see each other after work. Our skin has a memory of "good touch"(loved), "bad touch" (abused) and "no touch" (neglected). Couples who say hello with a hug keep their skin bathed in the "good touch," which can inoculate your spirit against anonymity in theworld.

7. Say "I love you" and "Have a good day" every morning. This is a great way to buy some patience and tolerance as each partner sets out each day to battle traffic jams, long lines and other annoyances.

8. Say "Good night" every night, regardless of how you feel. This tells your partner that, regardless of how upset you are with him or her, you still want to be in the relationship. It says that what you and your partner have is bigger than any single upsetting incident.

9. Do a "weather" check during the day. Call your partner at home or at work to see how his or her day is going. This is a great way to adjust expectations so that you're more in sync when you connect after work. For instance, if your partner is having an awful day, it might be unreasonable to expect him or her to be enthusiastic about something good that happened to you.

10. Be proud to be seen with your partner. Happy couples are pleased to be seen together and are often in some kind of affectionate contact -- hand on hand or hand on shoulder or knee or back of neck. They are not showing off but rather justsaying that they belong with each other.

Even if these actions don't come naturally, happy couples stick with them until they do become apart of their relationship. They know that it takes 30 days for a change in behavior to become a habit, and a minimum of six months for a habit to become a way of life and love.

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:D

Bedside Astrologer

I met a pretty interesting person last Saturday evening. His name is Damien, I think. I'm not sure if I heard his name right. Anyway, he was with my 2 best buds, Gerard and Czar. They actually came to visit me in my humble home. From the looks of it, he was Czar's friend. And during further interrogation, he actually was.

We were all exchanging stories about our own lives when Damien, out of nowhere, started telling us about astrology and how it can help us get along with other people. He was saying that people under "scorpio" are always horny, that people under "leo" are arrogant, and people under "taurus" are hot-headed. He's saying that these simple facts of astrology will actually make the solution to the puzzle a little clearer. The basic knowledge will tell you why that person is reacting that way to a specific situation and in return, you would know how to react to whatever happened.

He was giving out a tip about just asking for the person's birthdate just to be discrete then from that single information, you then perform the simple analysis according to what you know about the person's zodiac sign. It's actually amusing.

So I was just brushing up on my zodiacs. And an officemate of mine gave me this link. It's kinda lengthy but it is a fun read. Learn more about it too by just clicking this link.

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Hmm.. so two taureans in a relationship... both are passive yet also has an explosive wrath. Let's just see what happens..

A Random Ideology

I just wanted to share these...

"Everybody loves a lover but too many people lack staying power. Love should be fatal. You should never recover from it. If you can, then it wasn't love."

"You might love her, but what about the fact that she doesn't love you? Is love really love if only one person stays true to the cause?"

"Everything about love is random. So why try and bring order to it? It's not worth worrying about. I know we could just move in together and that would make everything much easier, but it works both ways. It's easier to walk out, it's easier to be unfaithful, it's easier for everything to just disappear. If I'm going to invest my emotions in another human being again then I'm going to make sure if it doesn't work out it'll be the messiest, most savage divorce ever."

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Quotes from "My Legendary Girlfriend" by Mike Gayle