Monthsary Unknown
Who would've thought that it would actually last this long? It isn't really that long ago but who's counting?! I'm happy. I'm here. He's also here. What more can I ask for? This might be it.
I am actually glad. Someone is here for me to be sad if I'm not replying to his text messages or answering his calls. Someone is here to be frustrated because we can't text when I'm at the office because of the so-called "VoIP Team". *Grr* Someone is here for me to be angry when I am with my other friends and I don't actually go home on the time that we have agreed upon. So why does it sound that I always distress him and yet I am the one that is happy about it?!? That's not the case.
I, again, am actually glad. Someone is here for me to be happy when we are together. It seems that no one else, except us, is around. Someone is here for me to be excited when we will be meeting again. It's just like we haven't met for 10 years but in reality, we parted ways not 24 hours ago. Someone is actually appreciative of petty promises like a meal at Katre or a piece of cake at Red Ribbon. The promises to make us want it more.
Wait. Too much happiness.
All of these things have transpired in just a month’s time. On the monumental day of being a "one-month" us, the celebratory dinner was cancelled, twice. The initial plan was on the day itself. I had a shift during the previous night and it was my rest day the following night, so it wasn't a problem for me. He had a class on that day from 7AM till 5PM, so it wasn't a problem for him either. We planned to have it a little after dusk. After my shift, I didn't actually go home directly. I still had to do some things at work. When I got home at a little after 12NN, we talked over the phone. I greeted him a happy anniversary. I was blabbing about how it feels like time does fly when you're enjoying yourself 'coz it feels like I've just known him a little over a week. Then he asks, "'Di ba 25?" I said, "25? ang alin?" Then I got what he was asking. "Hindi kaya. Sweldo nun eh. Pano ko makakalimutan yun?", I immediately replied. Silence happened. Then he started another topic.
Great. He doesn't want to admit that he forgot. He might have thought that the dinner that was scheduled for that night was just for us to be together. Well, that was actually the main purpose of it but I was expecting a little more special ambiance for the night. But it was all right. No harm done. That's easily forgivable. If that wasn't bad enough, he confirmed that he wouldn't be able to have dinner with me because he wasn't able to ask permission from his Mom. That is understandable, I know. That is a valid excuse. I shouldn't be sad. But I can't deny what I felt. I really wanted to go out with him. I was longing to be with him. But it's ok. No harm done again. We agreed to have it rescheduled for the next day. That is a Saturday night.
So after that phone call, I just lulled my sadness to sleep. With blaring dance music pounding at my ear, I became unconscious. Come 9PM that night, my mobile phone was already telling me to wake up. When half of my consciousness was already kicking in, I came to realize that my Mom was having a hard time sleeping because my brother was still watching TV and it was already 9PM. Even if the sound was relatively low, the light from the TV was flickering and since my Mom is a light sleeper, that flickering light will not make her sleep. She was really frustrated already. Then my phone was alarming so she was now bitching on all of us. I had to wake up already. Besides, I had an engagement in replacement of my non-existent dinner date that night. I was supposed to meet Gerard and JP before they headed off to Baguio that Friday night. My mind was actually not made up if I will indeed meeting him or not. (Sorry Ge!) I was not really in the mood to be with people. I was also still sleepy. Anyway, I decided not to go.
During that Friday night, all I did was set this blog up and try to learn the ins and outs of it. A little before midnight, I remember that he was calling me. At first, questions were common, just like two acquaintances meeting unexpectedly at a street corner. Answers were also short and brief; no special detail or enthusiasm was given. After a while, we were not able to resist it. Stories were volleyed back and forth with topics really anything under the sun. It was cut short because he was already sleepy and we have agreed to already sleep. I-love-you’s were exchanged and the call ended. Unfortunately, Mr. Sandman must have forgotten where I was and was not kind enough to sprinkle me with his magic sand. No more sleeping for Joel.
That morning, my Mom and I were scheduled to go house tripping with a few brokers, then my Mom’s cousin. We also went to some houses that we saw on newspaper ads. We were scheduled to leave at 7:45AM.
We did the house tripping. So exhausting. No sleep, no rest, no nothing. In addition, the sun was glaring at us. We were finally done by a little after 2PM. I thought I had a chance to catch a few winks because it was relatively early for me to prepare for the rescheduled dinner date. But no, there was this graduation party that we had to go to. At the same time, that snack/dinner party was also my Mom’s other cousin’s wedding 22nd anniversary. I tried to get my Mom to either have me go home alone just to rest my eyes. I even volunteered to just take a cab to get home. Both attempts were declined. My Mom as well as my Uncle said that it was a “social obligation” to attend to the said event. And so I said okay, thinking that I can take a nap during the said social gathering. When we arrived, alcohol was already being served. Other relatives were also there and social banter was at a peak. I had no other choice but to mingle. Around a couple of bottles of beer (a little over 4, I think), I reached my limit. With being sleepless, the exhausting house tripping, and the alcohol running through my veins, I was about to pay a whole month’s salary to just rest my head for a while, even if I don’t really go to slumber. But I remembered my dinner date and I felt awake again. I was actually exited. That was around 4PM-ish. I called him up, seeing that he had almost a dozen missed calls already registered on my phone. I got to talk to him. Then I just wished that what I heard was incorrect. He was not going to make it. Again. Strike two.
He said that there was an event that he had to attend to, some graduation party. I was speechless. I felt that all my efforts to be with him that night was wasted. I was extremely tired, overly sleepy, and undeniably light-headed. Efforts whirling down the drain. I was getting frustrated with what was happening. I needed to go. I think what my fault was I didn’t tell him right then and there what I was really feeling. I was saddened by the news. I think he new but didn’t want to react on it. I said goodbye. Went back to drinking another bottle. Just another one for the road. After an hour and a half more, my Mom did realize that I was really getting tired. And the best part of all of these is that I still need to drive us home since my Mom is as blind as a bat when the sun goes down and she did have more bottles than what I had. So I was the designated driver. With my current condition that moment, even I wasn’t sure if I would make it home safely.
Thank God. At around 7:30PM, I was half-mindedly parking our car in our garage. That night, I had made another engagement in replacement of my non-existent dinner date. Again. We were supposed to meet at Starbucks, T. Morato at around 10PM. I was determined that I will be able to follow by that time. I just needed some rest. So I positioned myself on the sofa and set my phone to wake me up at around 9:30PM so that I will have enough time to just even wash my face and brush my teeth before meeting up with my friends. As soon as my head touched the pillow, darkness overcome me. Blank.
I gained consciousness at around 7 ‘o clock in the morning. Just enough time to get ready to hear Mass. Mass was heard, an early lunch at KFC was eaten, groceries were bought, and school materials were purchased, my phone was again registering a few missed calls again. On the 9th missed call, I tried to call him. I wasn’t able to contact him. It was busy or something. I tried for around a dozen times to dial the number, but each time didn’t push through. So, I just sent him a text message. Sure enough, my phone was ringing again. I said hello. He blurted, “Bakit hindi mo sinasagot ang phone mo? Anong nangyari sa yo?” I explained to him what I did from the events that happened from the paragraph above up to the second sentence of this paragraph. He then asked, “Bakit ka pa nag-text? Alam mo naman na hindi ko mababasa yun di ba?” I just said that I was texting him because I wasn’t able to get through to him by calling and I just wanted to text him to let him know that I am trying to reach him. Then he shut up, calmed down, and then asked some thing that is totally off topic that I can’t remember.
When I got home, I thought about sleeping. I have to sleep because I still have a shift tonight. That was around 2PM already. I called him up. I was stunned when he asked, “Bakit?” What a greeting! Hmphf! Basically, that was something I really didn’t want to react to but I just told him the truth. I wanted to talk to him just because. That shut him up. Again.
A few petty and pathetic exchange of replies, it seemed like nothing is and was wrong. Everything was back to normal. Nothing has transpired. I then remembered that I still had an account anniversary to attend to. That was 6PM. OMG! It’s already almost 3PM and I still haven’t slept and I needed to go directly to my shift for work. Good luck to me.
The inevitable happened. I fell into a half-sleep. Woke up at 4:15PM. Took a bath. Made myself up. Went to the anniversary party of my account. Went directly to work. And here I am, typing profusely.
Bottom line is, things have happened that I can’t understand. Sleep is now a luxury to me. And this is my monthsary unknown.
I am actually glad. Someone is here for me to be sad if I'm not replying to his text messages or answering his calls. Someone is here to be frustrated because we can't text when I'm at the office because of the so-called "VoIP Team". *Grr* Someone is here for me to be angry when I am with my other friends and I don't actually go home on the time that we have agreed upon. So why does it sound that I always distress him and yet I am the one that is happy about it?!? That's not the case.
I, again, am actually glad. Someone is here for me to be happy when we are together. It seems that no one else, except us, is around. Someone is here for me to be excited when we will be meeting again. It's just like we haven't met for 10 years but in reality, we parted ways not 24 hours ago. Someone is actually appreciative of petty promises like a meal at Katre or a piece of cake at Red Ribbon. The promises to make us want it more.
Wait. Too much happiness.
All of these things have transpired in just a month’s time. On the monumental day of being a "one-month" us, the celebratory dinner was cancelled, twice. The initial plan was on the day itself. I had a shift during the previous night and it was my rest day the following night, so it wasn't a problem for me. He had a class on that day from 7AM till 5PM, so it wasn't a problem for him either. We planned to have it a little after dusk. After my shift, I didn't actually go home directly. I still had to do some things at work. When I got home at a little after 12NN, we talked over the phone. I greeted him a happy anniversary. I was blabbing about how it feels like time does fly when you're enjoying yourself 'coz it feels like I've just known him a little over a week. Then he asks, "'Di ba 25?" I said, "25? ang alin?" Then I got what he was asking. "Hindi kaya. Sweldo nun eh. Pano ko makakalimutan yun?", I immediately replied. Silence happened. Then he started another topic.
Great. He doesn't want to admit that he forgot. He might have thought that the dinner that was scheduled for that night was just for us to be together. Well, that was actually the main purpose of it but I was expecting a little more special ambiance for the night. But it was all right. No harm done. That's easily forgivable. If that wasn't bad enough, he confirmed that he wouldn't be able to have dinner with me because he wasn't able to ask permission from his Mom. That is understandable, I know. That is a valid excuse. I shouldn't be sad. But I can't deny what I felt. I really wanted to go out with him. I was longing to be with him. But it's ok. No harm done again. We agreed to have it rescheduled for the next day. That is a Saturday night.
So after that phone call, I just lulled my sadness to sleep. With blaring dance music pounding at my ear, I became unconscious. Come 9PM that night, my mobile phone was already telling me to wake up. When half of my consciousness was already kicking in, I came to realize that my Mom was having a hard time sleeping because my brother was still watching TV and it was already 9PM. Even if the sound was relatively low, the light from the TV was flickering and since my Mom is a light sleeper, that flickering light will not make her sleep. She was really frustrated already. Then my phone was alarming so she was now bitching on all of us. I had to wake up already. Besides, I had an engagement in replacement of my non-existent dinner date that night. I was supposed to meet Gerard and JP before they headed off to Baguio that Friday night. My mind was actually not made up if I will indeed meeting him or not. (Sorry Ge!) I was not really in the mood to be with people. I was also still sleepy. Anyway, I decided not to go.
During that Friday night, all I did was set this blog up and try to learn the ins and outs of it. A little before midnight, I remember that he was calling me. At first, questions were common, just like two acquaintances meeting unexpectedly at a street corner. Answers were also short and brief; no special detail or enthusiasm was given. After a while, we were not able to resist it. Stories were volleyed back and forth with topics really anything under the sun. It was cut short because he was already sleepy and we have agreed to already sleep. I-love-you’s were exchanged and the call ended. Unfortunately, Mr. Sandman must have forgotten where I was and was not kind enough to sprinkle me with his magic sand. No more sleeping for Joel.
That morning, my Mom and I were scheduled to go house tripping with a few brokers, then my Mom’s cousin. We also went to some houses that we saw on newspaper ads. We were scheduled to leave at 7:45AM.
We did the house tripping. So exhausting. No sleep, no rest, no nothing. In addition, the sun was glaring at us. We were finally done by a little after 2PM. I thought I had a chance to catch a few winks because it was relatively early for me to prepare for the rescheduled dinner date. But no, there was this graduation party that we had to go to. At the same time, that snack/dinner party was also my Mom’s other cousin’s wedding 22nd anniversary. I tried to get my Mom to either have me go home alone just to rest my eyes. I even volunteered to just take a cab to get home. Both attempts were declined. My Mom as well as my Uncle said that it was a “social obligation” to attend to the said event. And so I said okay, thinking that I can take a nap during the said social gathering. When we arrived, alcohol was already being served. Other relatives were also there and social banter was at a peak. I had no other choice but to mingle. Around a couple of bottles of beer (a little over 4, I think), I reached my limit. With being sleepless, the exhausting house tripping, and the alcohol running through my veins, I was about to pay a whole month’s salary to just rest my head for a while, even if I don’t really go to slumber. But I remembered my dinner date and I felt awake again. I was actually exited. That was around 4PM-ish. I called him up, seeing that he had almost a dozen missed calls already registered on my phone. I got to talk to him. Then I just wished that what I heard was incorrect. He was not going to make it. Again. Strike two.
He said that there was an event that he had to attend to, some graduation party. I was speechless. I felt that all my efforts to be with him that night was wasted. I was extremely tired, overly sleepy, and undeniably light-headed. Efforts whirling down the drain. I was getting frustrated with what was happening. I needed to go. I think what my fault was I didn’t tell him right then and there what I was really feeling. I was saddened by the news. I think he new but didn’t want to react on it. I said goodbye. Went back to drinking another bottle. Just another one for the road. After an hour and a half more, my Mom did realize that I was really getting tired. And the best part of all of these is that I still need to drive us home since my Mom is as blind as a bat when the sun goes down and she did have more bottles than what I had. So I was the designated driver. With my current condition that moment, even I wasn’t sure if I would make it home safely.
Thank God. At around 7:30PM, I was half-mindedly parking our car in our garage. That night, I had made another engagement in replacement of my non-existent dinner date. Again. We were supposed to meet at Starbucks, T. Morato at around 10PM. I was determined that I will be able to follow by that time. I just needed some rest. So I positioned myself on the sofa and set my phone to wake me up at around 9:30PM so that I will have enough time to just even wash my face and brush my teeth before meeting up with my friends. As soon as my head touched the pillow, darkness overcome me. Blank.
I gained consciousness at around 7 ‘o clock in the morning. Just enough time to get ready to hear Mass. Mass was heard, an early lunch at KFC was eaten, groceries were bought, and school materials were purchased, my phone was again registering a few missed calls again. On the 9th missed call, I tried to call him. I wasn’t able to contact him. It was busy or something. I tried for around a dozen times to dial the number, but each time didn’t push through. So, I just sent him a text message. Sure enough, my phone was ringing again. I said hello. He blurted, “Bakit hindi mo sinasagot ang phone mo? Anong nangyari sa yo?” I explained to him what I did from the events that happened from the paragraph above up to the second sentence of this paragraph. He then asked, “Bakit ka pa nag-text? Alam mo naman na hindi ko mababasa yun di ba?” I just said that I was texting him because I wasn’t able to get through to him by calling and I just wanted to text him to let him know that I am trying to reach him. Then he shut up, calmed down, and then asked some thing that is totally off topic that I can’t remember.
When I got home, I thought about sleeping. I have to sleep because I still have a shift tonight. That was around 2PM already. I called him up. I was stunned when he asked, “Bakit?” What a greeting! Hmphf! Basically, that was something I really didn’t want to react to but I just told him the truth. I wanted to talk to him just because. That shut him up. Again.
A few petty and pathetic exchange of replies, it seemed like nothing is and was wrong. Everything was back to normal. Nothing has transpired. I then remembered that I still had an account anniversary to attend to. That was 6PM. OMG! It’s already almost 3PM and I still haven’t slept and I needed to go directly to my shift for work. Good luck to me.
The inevitable happened. I fell into a half-sleep. Woke up at 4:15PM. Took a bath. Made myself up. Went to the anniversary party of my account. Went directly to work. And here I am, typing profusely.
Bottom line is, things have happened that I can’t understand. Sleep is now a luxury to me. And this is my monthsary unknown.
realized by Joel at 6:47 AM
3 Comments:
This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.
the moment i read your post, damn i felt like i really love what i feel right now. bla..bla..bla...ma lamang...inspired ako eh...pero, sobrang gusto ko nobela mo...so all those tiring experiences boils down to a body stuck in a soft cushioned bed with face tucked in a pillow (hanggang di ka makahinga)..matulog ka nga..but honestly...i love the story...kinilig ako PoooTik na yan oh..makahanap nga!! =)
happy birthday, joel!
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